The Squirrels are Plotting to Ruin Me

AMARULA: Alright, alright. It has come to my attention that there is a rumor going around the cat community in my neighborhood that I have been spotted running FROM a squirrel. I am here to dispel that ridiculous rumor! ME! Running from a squirrel!?? I survived the mean streets of Cape Town, South Africa for years before that human, Sandra, came along and “rescued” me off to Canada. I am certainly not going to turn in terror from a fat and furry rodent with a puffy tail! You can’t imagine the beating my reputation as the feline who put the “tude” in “Tortitude” is taking from these laughable lies! Even mangy “Fragile Frank” the skittish Cornish Rex down the street has taken to laughing and pointing as I strut by!

I will admit the so-called photographic “evidence” of me skedaddling from a squirrel does make it a little more difficult for me to explain my behavior–but explain I will:

Here, in the first photo, what looks to be me frozen in terror is actually me cleverly lulling the rodent into a false sense of security:

amarula and sq

Here, now that I have tricked the squirrel into thinking he is safe, I survey the situation and wait for the best moment to attack:

amaandsq3

I go into stealth mode, ready for my infamous and deadly I-never-saw-it-coming pounce:

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Now in this photo, what APPEARS to be me reconsidering my position and running rapidly towards home, is actually me turning to go after a gang of racoons—much bigger and more aggressive prey that are more worthy of my power-pounce! Sadly, my enemies have cleverly Photoshopped them out of the photo in their scurrilous efforts to defame me! But you can trust me, really! There was a gang of raccoons that I beat into submission and saved the day!

amagivesup

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